Blog Post #2: Resolving Interpersonal Conflict

A few years back, there had been a minor interpersonal conflict between my best friend and me. It was basically an issue of trust versus loyalty in a friendship.


The conflict involved 3 people: Cindy (my best friend), Sean (a close friend of Desiree) and me. Desiree, a common friend of ours, was not on talking terms with Cindy due to ‘BGR’ (Boy-girl relationship) problems was indirectly involved.

It all started a few days after Cindy realized that Desiree had been backstabbing her by telling tales about her to the guy, “M” that Cindy liked. After Cindy found out about it, both girls fell out with each other.

In an effort to help salvage the friendship, Sean approached for my help. I agreed and told him what I knew from Cindy’s point of view whilst Sean told me from Desiree’s. He also revealed to me that Desiree was interested in M too and made me promise not to tell anyone, especially Cindy. That struck me. That immediately justified Desiree’s actions.

My mind was in a whirl. Should I keep my promise or tell my best friend about it? Cindy and I were the best of friends. We never keep things from each other nor do anything that would jeopardize our friendship. I felt that that it was something that I ought to tell Cindy as that seems to be the root of their conflict. But, I did not want to go against my conscience.

After considering hard, I decided to tell Cindy. This was roughly what I said, “Someone told me something about Desiree but I can’t tell you who is it and what it’s about”. I know that that was ultimately foolish of me. The decision was either to tell or not to tell. Yet, the indecisive me chose to tell her parts of it and keep her in suspense. She was disappointed with me. And this led to the conflict.

The conflict later resolved after much explanation and apologies on my part.

Personally, I felt disappointed with myself for being indecisive. If I had not told her, the conflict would not have started at all.

Think about this. If you were in my shoes, would you be a man of your word and hide secrets from your best friend? Or, would you be a good friend and tell what she ought to know at the expense of breaking another’s trust in you?

Blog Post #1: Effective Communication *edited*

Why are effective communication skills important for me?

In my 21 years of life, there are a few bad events (in which I regret) that had occurred as a result of poor/ ineffective communication. Misunderstandings, misinterpretation, not being able to ‘listen’ or express myself effectively are the main reasons that had led to arguments and conflicts. Thus, I hope that with this module, I would be able to better express myself be it at an interpersonal level or to a wider range of audience that includes interviewers, colleagues, bosses, strangers etc.


Prior to this semester, I attended summer school at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA). Since it is an international summer school, the students that were enrolled in were of different nationalities, backgrounds and cultures. Although English was the common language of communication, our differences complicated things. For instance, even though we spoke the same language, the different accents and knowledge of the language made it slightly hard to communicate.

I must admit that this module was not ranked in the top few spots in the list of modules I plan to take this semester. Although there are many good recommendations for it, the seemingly heavy workload was daunting. But, after exploring the course website, I have come to know that skills being taught in the module such as building interpersonal communication skills, business letter/ email/ resume writing, job interview skills are those that I want to improve on as they are essential skills that would allow me to succeed futher in life.

With all that said, having effective communication skills are important as it helps us to get our ideas and intentions across better.